Bismillah

All praises and thanks are due to Almighty Allah SWT. Abundant salutations be upon His beloved Messenger Muhammad SAW.

Contraception: Apparently this is a private issue that I should not be posting about. But it’s nothing shameful. Care to explain to me what exactly is inappropriate about it? When I was studying the fiqh of nikaah (marriage), our teacher dedicated a whole lesson to contraception. There were both males and females in the class. Both need to know about it. Both spouses are affected by it. 

I firmly believe in family planning for various reasons:

1. I believe a baby deserves to be brought into a foundation made up of a solid relationship between their parents. When you just get married, you have a lot of learning and bonding to do with your spouse before you bring another person into your relationship. Having a baby inevitably puts strain on the marital relationship. You surely don’t have as much time for each other as you did before. Worst case scenario: If you decide to part ways, the decision won’t be affected by the baby nor will the baby be affected by the split. May Allah SWT protect our marriages🙏🙏🙏. Āmīn.

Just for the record, I don’t judge those who have babies straight away. I know some do and they’re all good, Alhamdulillah. May Allah SWT bless every marriage with understanding, happiness and success. Āmīn.

2. Bringing a soul into this world that you are responsible for nurturing is a big deal. It’s huge. And I don’t feel ready for it at this point in my life. The weight of knowing I could shape who they become weighs heavily on me. The most successful people who lived often attributed their success to their mothers. Or their parents. May Allah SWT bless our mothers and fathers who raised us to be who we are today. And may He guide us to be the best of parents. Āmīn.

3. Granted, every child comes with their own rizq, but financial planning surely helps to enhance the experience you’re able to give your child on so many levels, especially education-wise. Islamic Montessori schools aren’t affordable to everyone, but maybe with some financial planning beforehand, it would be. Apparently wealthy people in Cape Town apply to Bishops (CT’s best private school) when they find out they’re pregnant! That’s a bit extreme, but it highlights the value placed on excellent education. Not just primary school and high school but planning your child’s education until university and beyond. Starting an education fund is an idea. When one of my family members had a baby, my brother didn’t buy a baby outfit or blanket as a gift, he gave them some cash to start an education fund for the baby. (They didn’t take it seriously, and they’re struggling with this education issue a few years down the line). May Allah SWT ease the financial burdens of us all and place tons of barakah in our rizq, and increase us in all forms of rizq. Āmīn.

With best of du’as for your worldly and Hereafter success,

Wasfeeya.

If you’re too shy to comment, feel free to contact me via email: wasfeeya@gmail.com or WhatsApp: +27793500024. (Females only).

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