I love it when your aayaat cause tears to well up in my eyes and deeply move me. I will always remember the first time you spoke to me. I was sitting in class as Surah Baqarah was being translated and Mu’allimah translated, “And remember Him, as He has guided you, and indeed you were from before it definitely from those astray.” (2:198). It was the moment I realised that I was astray and I am now guided. (Alhamdulillah). I will also always treasure the very first time you moved me so much I was crying uncontrollably in my qiyaamul layl salaah. (It was a bit awkward because I didn’t have a tissue on me and my nose was running.) Mu’allimah had translated Surah Ar-Rahman before the salaah and then recited it in it. Her beautiful voice causes your remarkable words to penetrate the depths of my heart; the core of my being.
I’m sorry for neglecting you.
I won’t beat about the bush – there were times that I felt like you were a burden that I didn’t want to carry. I regretted memorising you because I found it so hard to get myself to just sit and recite, so I was caused to forget some you. I felt that I wasn’t worthy of you. However, I acknowledge that Allah chose me, selected me, hand-picked me out of tons of other people, to carry your every harakah, letter, word and ayah in my heart. I often feel like one of those people who the Prophet SAW described as the Qur’an not reaching past their throats. I ask Allah’s refuge from that. Even when I opened you after much procrastination, you still spoke to me.
So today, I renew my vows to you.
I, take you, Al-Qur’an, to be my companion in life, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, as long as I live. I commit, God-willingly, to learning everything there is to know about you. I’m interested to know why every part of you was revealed. I want to know every grammar rule that governs you, every manner in which you can be recited, every tajweed rule that beautifies your recitation and your meanings and their explanations, by Allah’s Permission and Will.